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From the Vault: In Your House #4 – The Great White North

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PWP’s Sam Thorne is back with his review of WWE’s latest “In Your House” pay-per-view, “The Great White North.”

Last time, WCW’s Fall Brawl trampled over the WWF’s In Your House 3, because it had more star power, generally better matches and it was a more entertaining watch overall. This time we’re looking at In Your House 4: The Great White North, often called a historic low point for WWF programming.

We’re straight to it, as the ring announcer tells us Bonnie.. someone is going to sing the Canadian National Anthem, which is actually really enjoyed by the audience. It’s usually sandbagged by wrestling fans. Then we’re straight to a message from Gorilla as he tells us outright, that Shawn Michaels will be relinquishing the Intercontinental Championship to Dean Douglas, but he will defend it straight away against Razor Ramon. Gorilla tells us it’s one of the hardest decisions he’s had to make, clearly trying to garner lots of sympathy for Vince McMahon‘s golden boy.

Vince welcomes us to Winnepeg arena as the hokey music from 1995 plays.

Two attitude stars start us off, as Fatu comes out wearing one of the most absurd coats I’ve ever seen. Blue, red, yellow and green just don’t belong on the same piece of clothing, it just doesn’t. Future Rikishi will be squaring off against future Triple H, as Hunter Hearst Helmsley makes his very slow entrance.

Fatu vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Fatu starts off straight away, pounding Helmsley before he can even take his coat off. An oddly heelish thing to do, from the clear good guy in this bout. The Samoan wastes no time in sending Hunter outside the ring with a throw, before he slams his head into the ring steps, before sliding him back in. The nobleman finally gets some offense in with a handful, but Fatu charges again. This time he’s punished, as his neck is caught between the ring ropes, as Helmsley delivers a diving punch.

Helmsley takes control and seems to be setting up for the Pedigree, but he hits a piledriver instead. HHH bows before the crowd, to a great heel pop. He continues to where Fatu down, whipping into the ropes, before a sharp knee to the mid section, but hunter can only manage a 2-count. Fatu’s grounded in a headlock but he fights out of it, eventually leading to an amazing clothesline from Triple H, even better than JBL‘s.

Fatu tries to get the better of Hunter with a cheeky roll-up, Hunter hits a DDT, but Fatu no-sells it and starts dancing instead. Big E, is that you? Fatu runs wild with a few shoulder blocks using his size against the considerably smaller opponent. Fatu hits a running bulldog, goes to the top rope, but misses the obvious splash. Hunter hits the pedigree, as he picks up the win.

Winner: Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Seeing the match-up on paper, I thought this would be garbage, but it was actually a really solid opener. It’s weird seeing two stars in the attitude era

wrestle completely differently here. Fatu’s much more athletic, has a much more varied offense and he’s much faster here, while Helmsley doesn’t wrestle at all like the heavyweight he becomes in later years. There’s not much story to this one but I’d recommend it, it’s surprisingly entertaining, especially if you’re a fan of Rikishi or Triple H.

After the match, King asks Hunter how Fatu smelled, but it’s all a stupid set up for another Godwinn run-in. The pig farmer tries to ‘slop’ Hunter, but he uses Lawler as a shield and manages to escape. Already tired of this gimmick and it’s nowhere near finished.

We’re backstage with Dox, Cornette and Davey Boy Smith, as Cornette says his man’ll pin Diesel again and then he’ll be WWF Champion. It was okay when Cornette was talking, but Bulldog isn’t any good at promos, whatsoever.

Smoking Gunns vs. Razor Ramon & 1-2-3 Kid
WWF Tag Team Championships

In the aftermath of In Your House 3: Double Header, it’s the new tag team champs crowned on Raw versus Razor and 1-2-3 in yet another chapter of their dysfunctional friendship angle. Razor and Kid must be on the same side this time as they’re both wearing purple.

Kid starts against Billy as the two lock up. It’s fast paced to start, but as soon as the Gunns start to bully up on Kid, he backs away to his own corner and tags in Razor. It’s nice to see something not done in every tag-match for a change, this was actually refreshing that the smaller, younger guy didn’t get immediately beaten in the corner, stranded for a hot tag.  Things have slowed down to a snail pace due to lots of time wasting by both Razor and Bart. Razor whips his way out of an arm drag while Kid lowers the ropes causing Bart to tumble outside. Razor hits Bart with a hammer toss to the corner as he collapses to the mat.

A huge chant starts for Razor, as he and Kid bully Bart in the corner, while Billy gets reprimanded by the ref for trying to save his partner. Razor tosses Bart overhead, and then tosses Kid into him after a quick tag. Bart’s still stranded in the corner, as we see great teamwork between Kid and Razor. Bart finally turns the tide as he hits a slam on Razor, but the hard camera cuts to Dean Douglas watching a TV backstage while making notes. It becomes more and more evident, that this match is most likely just an angle.

As we cut back, Bart gets the tag to Billy, as he runs wild on both Razor and Kid! Wasn’t expecting that. Billy tags the apparently injured Bart straight back in, as he grinds Kid down with a triple backbreaker, but Razor stomps him to kill the pinfall. Kid’s now stranded in the corner, but he manages to duck a splash by Billy! As both men are down, Razor leaves his post and puts Kid over Bart. While Razor’s arguing with the ref, he does the same with Billy over Kid, but Razor does it a third time as the ref starts to count! Unfortunately it’s only a very close 2 count for Kid.

Razor’s in as he batters both Gunns like the jobbers that they are. He lines Billy up for the Razor’s Edge, but Kid demands a tag. Razor questions it, but doesn’t go for the tag. He tags in Kid, Kid goes straight for the pin, but he screws up once again as Billy rolls him up out of nowhere for the win!

Winners: The Smoking Gunns

Kid starts to sulk but Razor leaves him to it and exits the ring. Kid starts to attack the guns from behind as they celebrate and he steals the belts! Razor’s back in, as he calms both men and hands the belts back to the retaining champs. Still no pay off to this pointless feud between Razor and Kid. This was a great match which was actually different to the very generic tag team formula, but the story it told doesn’t really seem to be going anywhere. That being said, great tag-team work from all men as far as I’m concerned.

Marty Jannetty vs. Goldust

Marty Jannetty’s lacklustre return in 1995 continues as he faces off against a debuting Goldust. The fans don’t know how to react as Goldust walks out to his incredibly extravagant entrance. He disrobes as glitter and gold scatters from the arena, fans still completely silent. Marty charges Goldust who immediately loses his wig! Marty hits a series of clotheslines and knocks him out of the ring within the first few seconds.

Goldust staggers off towards the entrance ramp to regroup. Marty chases him back in, but Goldust catches yet another breather against the guardrail. Marty calls him a chicken as Goldust finally gets in the ring. Both men exchange go-behinds, Goldie snatches a roll up, but Marty kicks out. Marty hits a great head-scissors, but Goldust immediately jumps back up and shoves Marty. They run the ropes for what feels like the seventh time this match, as Goldust flattens Marty with a lariat.

Marty’s grounded in a headlock, as Marty works towards to the slow escape. Goldust hits his third back bodydrop, but no pin because Marty’s feet are on the ropes. Goldie slams Marty’s head into the steps, as Goldust’s slow, boring and repetitive offense continues. Marty hits a snapmare over the top rope, what a great looking move!

Too bad he can’t capitalize, as Goldust counters again with yet another bump to the steps. Based on this match, it’s hard to believe that Dustin Rhodes got any kind of success with the Goldust gimmick, he’s far too slow and wooden at this point. The fans clap and cheer Marty who’s trapped in yet another headlock, as Goldust goes for a FOURTH back bodydrop, but Marty catches it this time, but misses a crucial splash to the corner.

Goldust sets up for a FIFTH back bodydrop but Marty counters again and climbs to the top, he lands on his feet and drops Goldust with a standing elbow. Marty hulks up as he hits a series of shockingly bad clotheslines, goes to the top again, but Goldie nails him in the chin with his leg. Goldust hits a face-first suplex for the win.

Winner: Goldust

This was a terrible match from a wrestling standpoint, Goldust used punches, back body drops, his finisher and almost nothing else. Plus, the only heat Rhodes got was go away heat, the crowd was pretty much silent. They were actually behind Jannetty even at this point, but it’s pretty obvious he was going to be fed straight to the debuting Goldust.

We get shown a clip from Raw, as we see the Men on a Mission squish the Undertaker. I feel bad for Randy if the episode was as dull as this clip was. King Mabel is out on his throne, but from just the clip we were just shown, I have absolutely no idea why Yokozuna’s facing Mabel, or why the Undertaker isn’t here. Oh well.

King Mabel vs. Yokozuna

So, we can pretty much count on this match being terrible. All three members of the announce team make fat jokes, as we get some great insight into the mind of Vince McMahon.

Mabel slaps Yoko as this battle of the beasts (feasts?) starts. Yoko hits Mabel with a clothesline as he almost breaks the second rope. Mabel’s back in, but Yoko’s kneeling down in the corner for some unexplained reason. Mabel knocks down ‘Zuna with a shoulder block off the ropes, as he tumbles to the floor.

The rest of this match is pretty much the same, clotheslines, slow punches, headbutts, almost nothing else. To make things worse, we get a time-wasting double count out to finish.

Winners: None (especially not the audience)

Yoko and Mabel get back in the ring for a showdown, teasing another match which absolutely no one wants to see. It’s only a tease however, as the two men hug and reconcile. Straight after, we get a video package teasing The Undertaker’s return at Survivor Series. Then we get a quick mention of Diesel vs Bret Hart for the title. Way to shill the next main event, before this one as even happened. I guess they thought it was fairly obvious that the world title wouldn’t change hands at an In Your House event, anyway.

Dox is in the ring and he’s introducing Dean Douglas. Dean laughs his way onto the ring as he’s about to receive his ill-gotten gains. Shawn Michaels comes and he does legitimately seem to be in rough shape from the real-life beating he received from three marines. A solemn HBK looks genuinely saddened as he passes the belt to Dean. Douglas snatches it away as he starts to celebrate, declaring ‘THAT WAS EASY’. Well, he’s not wrong. Only thing is, they never actually explained WHY Douglas is the #1 contender. Douglas’s music plays as Shawn makes his way back down the ramp.

Winner BY DEFAULT and new Intercontinental Champion Dean Douglas

And here’s the bad guy.

Dean Douglas vs. Razor Ramon
Intercontinental Championship

Razor’s pulling double duty, as the commentators ask how could Razor possibly have left. Regardless, he’s still the first out of the gate, as he puts Douglas in an arm drag and starts to work on the forearm. It’s odd how Razor’s wearing down Dean, even though he’s the underdog. We’re told Razor must be running out of his energy, but he seems perfectly in control to me. Razor’s backed into a corner, and Dean has to actually move the ref out of the way in order to stop away at Razor.

Dean’s offense is short lived as Razor catches him and hits a fall-away slam. Razor’s still in total control as Dean scrambles to climb back in. This would have made a lot more sense if Dean actually had ANY offense in the match he was supposed to have the clear advantage in, but that’s backstage politics for you. Razor crotches Dean on the railguard, dumps water on his head and sets up for the Razor’s Edge back in the ring! Douglas thankfully counters, as he takes it Razor on the outside.

We’re back in the ring and Douglas is on the top rope, but Razor kips up and hits him with a chokeslam. We almost never see that from someone who isn’t a super heavyweight. Douglas attacks, but Razor blocks ever punch and knocks him back over. Dean goes up to the top rope again, this time Razor gets a roll-up, but Dean counters. Razor hits an elbow drop, and loosely drapes his arm over Dean, but Dean’s leg is outside the ring, clearly under the rope.

There’s a slight delay, but the ref calls it, it’s Razor’s win.

Winner: Razor Ramon

What a gigantic anticlimax. No redemption story, no comeback, no dedication to Shawn, Dean looked like a total chump and even the new champ’s win was a total fluke! Actually makes you feel a little bad for both Dean Douglas the character and Shane Douglas the man. The kliq completely buried him at this pay-per-view and the booking didn’t even make Razor look great anyway. An absolute waste is all I would call this match.

Bret Hart makes his entrance, but don’t get excited, he’s not working this time. Having your best wrestler skip the pay-per-view seems like a great way to make In Your House just that little bit worse. Bret scares Lawler off and takes his place at commentary for the main event. Oh goody.

Instead of a pre-match video package, Dox Hendrix tries to shamelessly sell us lots of awful WWF merchandise. Dox then asks how Diesel feels. He says he feels funky.

Diesel vs. The British Bulldog
WWF Championship

Diesel and Bulldog lock up, before immediately wasting time as they break, and circle each other in the ring. Bulldog runs the ropes, but gets clocked by Diesel. Bulldog tries it again, goes for a crossbody, but Diesel slams him, as Davey bails out of the ring to recuperate. Diesel rolls him back in and hits multiple running clotheslines from corner to corner, before wearing Davey down with a few stiff elbows. Davey retaliates with a strike to the quad (but no tear), but he does hit a great dropkick to send Diesel out.

Diesel stares down Hart and shoves him, but Bulldog takes advantage from behind. Bulldog then stares down Bret, before rolling Big Daddy Cool back in. The fans chant avidly for Diesel as Davey gets to work on the left ankle. Bulldog grabs both legs and goes for a weird semi-hold, but breaks it to stomp on the head of Nash anyway. Cornette joins in with a crafty elbow and a few stomps to Diesel, as he’s down on the outside.

Davey rolls Diesel back in and locks in a half-Boston Crab, before bailing on the hold yet again to stop his knee instead. Bulldog now puts on the full Boston Crab. Diesel starts to come back, but Bulldog drops it before he can escape, before stomping Diesel back down to the matt.

The next ten minutes of the match plays out the same way as you’d expect, Diesel teasing multiple come backs with Davey stopping him each time, before a dozen more restholds, I won’t bore you with the details. We get the eventual finish as Davey and Diesel are both down on the outside after finishers attempts, as he slaps the face of Bret Hart. Bulldog runs back in the ring, as Bret follows him and slaps the shit out of Davey Boy, as Hebner calls for the bell.

Winner by Disqualication: British Bulldog

And so our long and arduous main event for the world title ends with a shitty DQ finish, as Diesel and Bret brawl awkwardly in the ring with multiple refs trying to break them up. Eventually jobbers galore try to separate the two men as Vince thanks us for watching. This match was awful, partially because it was incredibly slow, partially because it made Diesel look weak and Bulldog look moronic.

Why did Bulldog bother to slap Hart when he was most likely going to win the world title? Why was Hart more annoyed at Diesel afterwards? This was both boring and nonsensical at best.

As for In Your House #4 as a whole, it was a night of boring wrestling and nonsensical finishes. The tag match with Kid and Razor was entertaining, but we already know the result as soon as the match starts. They well and truly buried Dean Douglas, Goldust came out to a mediocre debut, while a young Hunter Hearst Helmsley managed to wrestle a good match out of Fatu. Ultimately, there’s not one match that this show is worth watching for, and there isn’t one appealing angle or feud that’s worth following out of this.

That’s it for this time, be sure to join me in my next review for Halloween Havoc ’95, as Big Show and Hogan face-off in monster trucks!


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